


Sexual Harassment

by The_Engineer



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Fluff and Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-26
Updated: 2014-10-26
Packaged: 2018-02-22 15:55:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 738
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2513405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Engineer/pseuds/The_Engineer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ianto Jones is accused of sexual harassment by none other than Jack. Just a little crack fic that caught my attention.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sexual Harassment

It was a quiet day in the hub and Ianto decided to work on some much needed archiving when.....

Ianto was quietly making label for the reports to be filed in the archives when he heard quiet footsteps coming down the hallway, and smiled. He knew who the footsteps belonged to so he continued to work biding his time. Soon a quiet cough interrupted his thoughts.

Ianto glanced up to see a very serious faced Jack holding a few sheets of paper.

“Jack?” Ianto asked furrowing his brow.

Without saying anything Jack set the pieces of paper on the desk in front of Ianto.

Ianto glanced at the papers, shock and surprise registering on his face.

“Oh?” is the only thing Ianto could think to say.

“Yep.” Jack just nodded and continued to looking grim.

“This is serious." Ianto looks at Jack who just nods.

"You are accusing me of sexual harassment.….. _you_ are filling a claim that I sexual harassed you. You claim that last Wednesday the 9 th at 2pm while down in the cells I…”quote-made inappropriate comments about plaintiffs anatomy, that I also described several sexual situations regarding plaintiff, that I groped said anatomy described in prior described sexual situation. I also rubbed, groped and…licked plaintiff.”

“Well…..” Ianto said looking at Jack again. “You even wrote down word for word said inappropriate comments and sexual situation, I have to say I am impressed, I…didn’t think you had that well of a recall.”

“There’s more, page 2.” Jack said a hint of anger in his voice.

“Plaintiff Captain Jack Harkness, filing this complaint against Ianto Jones for _failure_ to comply with said inappropriate comments and sexual situation Ianto Jones described on the following date and time etc….”

“But Jack, there was a rift alert, there wasn’t time to follow through with the….uh….” Ianto turns the page back to recite the inappropriate comments upon anatomy and sexual situations.”

Jack leans in hands flat on Ianto’s desk his voice low and dangerous, “doesn’t matter. You made inappropriate comments about my anatomy and describe in graphic detail I might add, sexual situations leaving me the impressions that I would be on the receiving end of said sexual situations. Your failure to carry out described situation left me in a state of sexual frustration. That is sexual harassment.”

Ianto just looks at Jack and nods, “I see your point. Perfectly valid points too….”

“So what are we going to do about this Mr. Jones?” Jack asks.

“Nothing…..” Ianto replies smiling.

“Nothing?” Jack growls back.

“Nothing, because you fail to understand the nature of this form Jack. You filled out at A913 Sexual Harassment in the Workforce, form, which is not really appropriate for _this_ situation, also it was incomplete…you forgot to sign it. I however….” Ianto pulls out a piece of paper and politely hands it over to Jack. “Filled out the appropriate C245 form Sexually Harassing Co-Workers on Company Property, about the incident that happened just yesterday in the SUV after the weevil hunt.”

Jack is reading the document and glares at Ianto.

“So what you’re saying is my claim is not valid but yours is?”

“Oh, it is a valid claim, I will place the…complaint in my personal record, however I do not think anything will come of it. My claim however…..I think you will see is justified and would be considered for action.”

“Oh really?” Jack takes a step back and crosses his arms over his chest.

“Let me just files these away in our respective personnel files.” Ianto, knowing this was going to happen pulls out a file from on top his desk that is so thick his hands barely fit around it and is held together with a rubber bands. “Been busy have we _sir.”_ Ianto says as he places the form on top of the others in the folder. Ianto then places Jack’s folder on his desk and retrieves his slight smaller folder and places the offending paper in his folder. “Not quite up to your standard yet Jack, but I am working on it.”

“So what are you going to do about my complaint?” Jack wants to know. Ianto smiles and approaches

“Now _Sir,_ would you like me to demonstrate why my claim…tops yours?” Ianto raises an eyebrow causing Jack to grin and lick his lips in anticipation of being sexually harassed by his lover.

 


End file.
